The first day of school

My only hope is the truth of His Word on the tip of my tongue... ready to remind my heart that I-CAN-DO-THIS... with my Jesus leading the way. 

I would't say that homeschooling my children is a strength of mine, but I am glad I can grow in my weakness.  See, when you are weak you have no other choice but to live by faith, depending on Jesus throughout the entire day. I have finally discovered (because it usually takes me a good couple of tries) that growing in my weakness is actually God's way of developing the ability to trust Him, lean on Him.

My natural way of doing things is to plan, but not just plan my day I need to know what will happen, all outcomes and when it will happen.  God's preference is for me to depend on Him continually, trusting Him to guide me throughout my day, strengthen me as needed. This is how I will grow in my weakness.  Boy is it hard and what better situation than homeschool (one of my many weaknesses).  I will need to stamp my forehead with Proverbs 3:5 "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding."

"Milly" is entering 1st grade

"Audge" entering Kindergarten

"Roo" Entering Preschool

And he will keep me really busy..........

Prayers for this homeschooling year.....as summer ENDS...

I have a few prayers for this upcoming year...

"Peace makers who sow in peace, produce a harvest of righteousness." James 3:17

May I remember that life is not an emergency, that some days will be smoother than others, and that I have the privilege of setting the tone under this roof. May I be a peace-maker? And as these treasures grow may there be a harvest of righteousness happening in this place?

Patience is defined as "joy-filled, long-suffering."

May I learn to be patient? 

May I pass out patience as freely as my Savior pours out patience all over me?

Please Lord.

Grant me the right kind of confidence Lord?

"Such confidence as this is ours through Christ before God.

Not that we are competent in ourselves to claim anything for ourselves, but our competence comes from God."

2 Corinthians3:4-5

May the things that matter to You, matter to me?

"Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervor, serving the Lord.

Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction,

faithful in prayer. Share with God's people who are in need. 
Practice hospitality." Romans 12:11-13

Lord may I live in the shadow of your wings for another school year,

remembering in each moment, that You Alone are the strength of my life.

Tomatoes Anyone?

My first batch of tomatoes was gently and thoughtfully transformed into irresistible pizza sauce-made fresh for my loves- than canned to experience later in the bleak of winter.

My second batch was planned to maybe spaghetti sauce and as the garden my third batch will likely be ketchup....

Well, this year was a great year for our tomatoes (despite the stink bug)! We have an abundance. I mean so many that when people come into the house they are certain to comment on the amount of tomatoes on the window sill, around the sink, on the counter, in the frig.... everywhere.  Some might say that we were rich in tomatoes, I guess we are (if only we could pay for gas with tomatoes).

This got me thinking.  It reminded me of a recent read. Mark Buchanan came up with a simple exercise to shift our thinking in the book Spiritual Rhythm.

We've tended toward scarcity thinking, ever since the fall (as in the original rebellion).  Indeed, the serpent incited humankind's rebellion by stirring up a crisis around the threat of scarcity.  He distracted Adam and Eve from the abundance God provided and got them pinning for the one thing God withheld. "You haven't got enough", was his opening ploy.  It's worked pretty well for him since.

Have you got enough? Or asked another way, how rich are you? Take stock of your abundance.  List the obvious things-clothes to wear, a place to live, a chair to sit, friends or family to have meals with, meals themselves.

But then move on to those things you rarely stop to appreciate

-air                                                                   -     

-water

-bumblebees (hard at work pollinating my tomato plants)

 -hands and feet  

-eyes and ears

 -the sound of rain  

 -a Bible verse that's been a lifelong companion 

-a grandfather who taught you how the tie a knot 

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                            You get the idea.  A list like that can get very long.  It can get so long it can almost make you forget there's anything missing.

Then he said to them, "Watch out! Be on your guard against all kind of greed; life does not consist in an abundance of possessions" Luke 12:15

Were you always like this?

A dear friend has continuously told me, recently, how easy going I am and how I seem to exhibit low anxiety. 

I WAS NOT ALWAYS LIKE THIS......

My heart was hardened early in life, not an excuse, but it contributed to assisting me to develop a people pleasing personality.  Yup, me a pleaser, to everyone. I mean, not just make people happy, but 

make myself look perfect.  I had a mindset that I had to be perfect and if I couldn't be perfect than I would perceive to be perfect. 

perfect relationships, perfect employee, perfect friend,

perfect wife, perfect mom, perfect daughter, perfect sister,

perfect christian

It wasn't just the attitude of achievement and perfection, there was an underlying of fear.

Fear of people finding out what I really was made up of.  This is a sad mixture 

and resulted in depression and anxiety.

Stressing about always having a perfectly clean home just in case anyone stopped by uninvited

was ruthless.  Who was I kidding nobody wanted to come into a CRAZY woman's house

-not even my children or husband.

I barely knew who I was because I spent so much time trying to be what others 

wanted me to be, that I became miserable and controlling. I never had close friends

that wasn't my style.  When things were starting to go bad it was much easier to walk away; 

I had nothing invested in them.

It wasn't until recently (few years ago). That I realized that I can't control anything even though I want to.

So, I started to let go of some of that grip.  

The grip I held on to for all circumstances and outcomes.

I began to listen very intently to the Holy Spirit....and I prayed.

I prayed a prayer not many would thing of praying. I prayed that God would

cut into my ungrateful heart and make me whole.

This journey didn't happen overnight.  Some looking from the outside in might describe

 it as ugly and messy.  Many have told me how stupid I was for praying

my simple prayer, but I still pursue, I seek, I hunt, I chase, and I desire

God and everything that HE is.

I am leaps from where I was but still have a long way to go because He 

continues to promise me that He will renew my strength and saturate

me with peace.

Besides this isn't my story, I am only here to help tell the story.

In the same way the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us through wordless groans. Romans 8:26

Be careful of how you live- not as unwise but as wise, making the most of every opportunity because the days are evil. Ephesians 5:15-16

This Momentary Marriage

Well, I stumbled upon this video, not by accident.  I was humbled and inspired and motivated.  After my husband, Jason and I watched it together, we decided to order the book and read it together (Eeeek!) For the last how many months, years, we have always had little ones whom have taken up more time than expected so devoting time to ourselves and our marriage hasn't been what we would hoped.  We want to reflect a Godly marriage and I think this story is a pure example of that.

(you might consider pausing the music while watching this video)

Some things are primary.  But most of the things we fuss about are only secondary.

Absolutely humbled.

Gearing up for a new school year...

I know many home school families are ordering their curriculum and that is something we are doing, but I am also focusing on my heart.  I came across a quote in my daily devotion, "Learn to enjoy life more. When you walk through a day with childlike delight, savoring every blessing you proclaim your trust in Me." 

I want to go into this new school year slow and calm, with the mind of simple.  I want to focus on the children and not the amount of activities we are involved in.  I am hoping to keep this mind all year no matter what comes. It was Ann Voskamp, who said, "Haste makes waste.  Life is not an emergency.  Life is brief and it is fleeting but it is not an emergency". 

I know that God will be there with me! "In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness.  

We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for 

us through wordless groans." Romans 8:26

Thank you GOD! because honestly I don't think that slowing life down and focusing on simple beauty 

within my children comes naturally for me, so I will need God.

   

         

  

  

  

 

 

 

 

  

 

 

 

 

So here's to another YEAR, but slow and intentional!